Well, I guess that will never happen again. I thought maybe you were going to be the different one from every other one, but of course I was wrong again. Don’t get me wrong thoe, you still mean the world to me no matter what. But it’s going to be different between us for awhile. If you don’t hear from me, don’t be surprised.
This whole thing put me in a funk the last couple days.. I can’t seem to get you or it off my mind.. But I’ll get there. It just takes time.
So it’s been awhile since I’ve posted anything on here. Or even just reblogged something. Very disappointed in my self..
But anyways…
I just need to get this off of my chest.
I have had alot on my mind lately. Pretty much revolving around the same thing. You. I miss you like crazy. It’s been awhile since we talked and i have no idea what I would say to you. It’s killing me that i know you probably don’t give two shots if we have talked or not. Like really? I been down for you and cared about you for a long time now. How can you just brush it off like its nothing? You know for a fact I would never do anything like that to you. I honestly thought you actually cared about me. More so after you toldme multiple times you didn’t want to lose me. Well look what’s happening now! You’re losing me. Soon ill be gone. And i don’t know if I will come back.
There comes a time in everyone’s life when they need to rid their life of things unneeded and praise for the great things they do have. I believe I have come to that part of my life. In my life I feel like I have alot of hatred and just plain anger towards some people.. And I don’t want that type of thing in my life. I don’t need it. Yes, everyone has those kind of emotions and feelings towards people, but you just dot want that kind of thing in your life, neither do I. I used to really care about alot of people. Some more than others, but I had genuine love for them in my heart. They meant alot to me. But I finally realized after all this time and effort and a few people telling me that those other people didn’t give a dam about me, that they really don’t care at all. I wasted alot of time on you certain folks. Not anymore. I’m not going to be anyone’s putty party or have a bunch of people mooching off me. Not going to happen. Done with all of you.
Really? Are you serious??
Now, I’m not saying that I am the perfect person or anything. Or expect you to be perfect. But how you gonna forget my birthday?? You of all people, I wouldn’t think you would. We were talking about it 2 days before it!! I didn’t need a call or a text. Just simple happy birthday with a tweet or on Facebook would have been great. But nothing.. I heard from some people I havnt talked to since graduation. That amazed me that YOU would forget. Seeing as you sent me a text at 3 in the morning last year on my birthday. Doesn’t make no good sense. So yeah, I’m pretty much done being associated with you. Sorry.
Well thanks anyways.
So I literally havnt posted anything for about a month now.. So much to say, well not really..
Big things are going to happen next semester. My first season of junior college baseball stars February 2nd!! So juiced.. Didn’t think I was going to be an everyday in the line up player this year.. But I am. I almost went crazy when coach told me. I couldnt sleep at all the day I found out. I was up for hours!! But this is something that I have really worked hard for.. And I’m achieving things I challenged myself with.
So my birthday is in 3 days.. This will officially be my last year of being in the “teens” lol. But for my birthday this year I am getting three things.. Already know all of them.. Got a new glove.. Getting new spikes for the season. And finally getting the tattoo I been asking for, for almost year now!!
So happy that I am getting it.. My Papa and my bro Anthony will now be with me everywhere I go…
R.I.P Papa and Anthony!!! Infill tomorrow…
“forever in my heart”